Patrick "The Ghost with the Most" Swayze: Your time is now

People often stop me on the street to ask me why I want to be a famous writer. Truth be told, it's because I want to meet America. Tod Goldberg demonstrates:

Chatty: I've been down there before, back when my wife -- my ex-wife -- was publishing her Patrick Swayze fan magazine.

Me: Your wife published a Patrick Swayze fan magazine?

Chatty: Ex-wife.

Me: So she published it after you were divorced?

Chatty: Oh, no, while we were married, too.

File the whole lot of it under "funniest thing I've read in ages". (I don't know what a "slow crush" is, either, but I think I suspect I might maybe want one.)